MASSIVE FAIL! And about that Card Exchange....

It takes me a while to get a clue sometimes.  I finally clued in to the fact that Tracy over at The Superhero and the Princess has a Christmas Card Exchange set up as well.  And that she'd coordinated the exchange last year too.  So...if no one minds, I'm going to cancel the exchange through me and direct you all to head on over to fill in Tracy's Card Exchange Form.  She's ever so graciously extended her deadline to December 1st to accommodate the merger.  So head on over and join in the fun!


Massive fail....seriously, massive fail.  What a Thanksgiving holiday we've had in our home!  That trip we were supposed to take?  Cancelled.  Turns out that the weatherman predicted a possibility of blizzard-like conditions for the second half of our trip.  We've attempted that kind of drive a couple of times, pre-children and in some pretty dire circumstances.  It's not something we wanted to repeat.  So, we cancelled and stayed home.  But we didn't cancel until Wednesday morning.  So, Tuesday, I missed out on my workout and spent the day trying to prepare for our trip north.  Wednesday, the weather was too scary to go anywhere.  No workout.  Thursday.  Well, we all know what Thursday was.  I spent it in a bit of a funk, having dinner at my MIL's.  Don't get me wrong, I was grateful that my MIL was thrilled to have us and that we had an alternative to driving north in blizzard-like conditions.  But, Thanksgiving is the one and only holiday we spend with my family.  We never go north for Christmas.  It's too crazy and too cold.  We don't go up for Easter.  I absolutely love spending the Fourth of July up there (it's a whole community thing and is so much fun), but it rarely works out so that we can spend that particular holiday up there.  So, I spent the day sad and wishing we could have been with my family instead of just being grateful for what we have.  Awful of me, I know.  So, no workout on Thanksgiving.  Three days off.  It was bad.  And it didn't do my mood any favors.  Friday, Lily and I were both having some blood sugar issues.  We were doing fine on Thanksgiving.  I'm not quite sure what the deal was on Friday.  But Lily spent most of the day in the 400s, feeling awful.  I spent most of the day in the 200s, feeling awful.  My husband doesn't quite understand how blood sugars affect my ability to workout.  He was ready to head off to the gym first thing in the morning.  I had to pull him back and explain that we needed to wait until both Lily's blood sugar and mine had come down a bit.  At lunch, Lily was down to 299.  So, we ate lunch and headed to the gym.  Forty minutes into my workout, my blood sugar crashed on me.  We picked Lily and Leo up from the child-care center, tested her....426.  Home we went.  Changed her pump and finally got things back on track.  Saturday, we were all actually feeling pretty good.  Made it to the gym to workout.  Twenty minutes in, I was called to the child care center to change Leo's stinky rear.  I had to force myself to head back to the elliptical.  Ten minutes into my second attempt, I was called down to change Lily's stinky rear.  I'm still not sure how I managed to do it, but I did get back on the elliptical for a third time.  I did a 35 minute stretch and then headed off to the locker room.  I somehow managed to be 10 minutes late picking the kids up from the child care center.  I think, considering the two poops I was called in to clean up, they must have understood at least a bit!

Big sigh........gotta release all the pent up frustration I've been feeling.  It's been a rough couple of days.  Lily hasn't been feeling the greatest and has had some kind of stomach issue going on.  It doesn't appear to be a bug, since Leo obviously isn't suffering from it yet.  We're trying to keep an eye on what she eats and see if we can figure out what might be irritating her.  Between a cranky child, a tired little boy, an irritable husband, and my own disappointments, it hasn't been a very pleasant time in our home.

Okay, enough complaining!  Seriously, whining is not exactly productive.  And really, when it all comes down to it, I have no cause to whine and complain.  I have a fantastic husband, two beautiful and amazing children, a cozy home, a good life.  And since today is supposed to be devoted to our non-d children, I'm going to share with you some Leo.  He's guaranteed to make you smile.

I know, total picture overload, right?  But seriously, look at that face?  How do you resist it?  Leo is quite the character.  The kid cracks me up every day, in more ways than one!  He's always into something, always on the move, always trying to entertain everyone.  He's learned to open the dishwasher and use the door to give himself a little boost up to see and grab everything on the counter.  Oh, and to push the buttons on the stove.  We drop him and Lily off in the child care center at the gym and when we go to pick them up, he greets me with the biggest grin and an enthusiastic shout of "mommy!".  The workers there tell us of his escapades while he was there...the climbing the bookshelves, hauling toys around to give himself a boost up to the top of the gates, snuggling up with the pretty girls.  Leo is an ever-present reminder to not take life too seriously.  To lighten up and see the humor in each day.  To take a minute to sit down and snuggle.  He's my little snuggle bug.  My comedian-in-the-making.  I think he has a very bright future as a class clown and a ladies man.  For as much trouble as he can be, he makes up for it by bringing us giggles and kisses.  You should hear him read Curious George books.  There's a whole lot of animated gibberish with the occasional yell of "George".  That little face of his makes me just want to grab him up in the biggest squeeze.  And the best thing about him?  He idolizes his big sister.  Adores her!  She is his favorite person in the whole world.  She's the only one he says "Love you" to.  They have their moments and their little tiffs and struggles, but really, she lights up his world!  His humor, his caring personality, and his hero-worship of his sister....it all makes him a hero too!  He is my amazing, wonderful little boy!

Hats, turkeys, and blizzards....oh my!

We're heading north tomorrow.  Five hours north.  The Icebox!  We always drive up north to have Thanksgiving with my family.  Usually, I'm more than ready to go since we only make it up for a visit about twice a year.  I'm kind of nervous about heading up tomorrow though.  The entire state of Minnesota is under a Winter Weather Advisory.  Meaning, it could potentially get very, very nasty.  Rain, sleet, snow, all mixed together.  Yikes!  My husband is an excellent driver and I'm sure he'll get us there just fine.  But....the forecast still has me debating if going up is the best idea....

Anyway, before we head up, I wanted to share a couple of new hat pictures.  I realized a couple of days ago that this trip up north means my children need some heavy-duty headgear.  Something to keep their ears warm and toasty, no matter how nasty it might be.  Luckily, I was able to whip up a couple of hats really quick.  Here they are:

Okay, so Blogger doesn't want to let me add those pictures.  I'll have to try again in a bit.  I also wanted to remind everyone who wants to take part in the Christmas card exchange (yes, I do see your comments saying that you want to take part)....I need your addresses!  Send them to me, please!  You have until December 1st to do so!

Nope, it still doesn't want to let me load the photos of the hats!  Darn it!  They're so cute that I wanted to show them off!  Oh well....maybe I'll get a minute in the morning to post them.  For now....Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!  I'm wishing all of you a day of food, fun, and fantastic blood sugars, in spite of all that food, fun, and pie!

**Yay!  Pics are up!

Random Thoughts...

I'm in a quirky kind of mood tonight.  So, I'm going to share some random thoughts I've had this past week with all of you.  Give you a peak inside the very odd, twisted mind that I have!  Sometimes, I have great ideas that really make lots of sense.  Sometimes, they're just weird thoughts that pop up now and then.  And sometimes, there's just no making sense of them at all!

1. To the young "man" who worked out on the elliptical in front of me yesterday....PULL YOUR PANTS UP!  Seriously, I understand that this is a cultural thing that I have no hope of ever understanding (along with the desire to call yourselves "thugs" and the n-word, which I refuse to even type), but gym shorts have elastic waistbands and are meant to be worn at your waist.  It really defeats the purpose of working out if you have to stop every two minutes to retrieve your shorts from your ankles.

2. I saw T.R. Knight again.  I swear it must be him!  Looks just like George O'Malley, but with lighter hair.  It's got to be him!

3. The government should hire me.  I have great ideas on how to fix some of our nation's problems!  The obesity epidemic?  Give employers an incentive so they'll pay their employees to work out!  You work out for 30 minutes, you get paid for 30 minutes.  I bet this would increase production too.  Sitting at a desk job on your rear-end for 8 hours a day is not healthy and does not mean that you'll get 8 hours worth of work done! At least half that time is spent zoning out due to boredom and lack of activity!

4.  Coffee is an amazing thing.  I am seriously in love with whoever came up with the idea of crushing those little beans and pouring water through them to get an extremely caffeinated beverage.  Love it!

5.  Message I'd like to send to all of the politicians....Put your big girl/big boy panties on already!  Just because you've grown up doesn't mean you should leave the rules of the playground behind.....you have to play nice, even if you don't like him/her!  A group project needs to be completed even if only half of the people contribute.  If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.  Put your thinking caps on and get to work on figuring out solutions to the problems.  Enough bickering already!

6.  While you're at it, remember this very important concept..."Power to the people".  It's not "power to the party who has the most votes"!

7. Godiva Milk Chocolate with Salted Caramel = divine bliss!

8. Even when circumstances suck and things aren't working out the way you want them to, we should all take a moment to remember this....LIFE IS FANTASTIC!

9. Instead of preaching about tolerance for people's differences....why don't we preach about accepting people's differences?  Is tolerance really the best we can aim for?  We should embrace differences, not "tolerate" them!

10.  Pppppppppppppphhhhhhhhhhhhhlllllllllllllllllllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeebbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbtttttt.
Sorry....just had to have one little nonsensical moment!  Wonder if lack of sleep is finally turning my brain to complete mush?  Oh well.....if it is, it is.  I'll just have a grand life as a mushy-brained d-momma!  Maybe we'd all be a bit better off with more mush in our heads....

So did it work?

I'm going to bare some yucky stuff here before I get started on my post for the night.  This evening, my husband and I dropped the kids off at grandma's to go see Harry Potter (I'm a nut, seriously).  After the movie, we picked up Arby's for a quick dinner for the kids and ourselves.  My husband was trying to figure out the carb-count and he said he thought about 15 grams for the entire small curly fry order that Lily ate.  I didn't want to push, although I did suggest looking it up in our Calorie King book.  He gave her insulin for 41 grams of carbs.  Two hours later:

She's asleep with an empty water bottle.  My d-kid chooses a water bottle as her lovey!  Tested her...442!  Apparently, those small fries have 39 grams of carbs and our carb-count was off by 24!  Teaches us a lesson, doesn't it?  Never guess on the carb count!


I know you're all wanting to ask it, right?  Did the 30-day challenge work?  It's the question I get asked a lot in the last few days.  The whole point of the 30-days of exercise was to make it a habit and not just an option anymore.  And you know what?  The answer is YES!  But......

Here's the thing....when you think of a habit, the things that come to mind are brushing your teeth, combing your hair, maybe biting your fingernails....all little things.  Things that don't take much effort to do and take no planning at all.  Exercise is not like that.  It requires planning.  It requires effort.  You have to dress for it.  You have to pack a bag to go off to the gym.  You have to check blood sugars (x2 here).  I have to feed the kids a snack just before we go so they don't get hungry while they're in the child care center at the gym.  And the fact is...I'm just not a morning person.  It takes me time to get going each day.  So it's usually mid to late afternoon before we make it to the gym.  But....in the 21 days in November, I've only missed making it to the gym 5 times so far!  One of those days was my "break" day at the end of the 30-day challenge and it was spent walking around the zoo with the kids for a few hours.  Another day was spent running around The Children's Museum.  Even on the days when we don't make it to the gym, we are more active than we were before.  We get out and have fun and run around and enjoy each other's company.  And the ultimate truth....every day, I do get a feeling that I can only describe as being "compelled" to go to the gym.  I've ignored it once because I had a head cold coming on, but that's the one and only day that I've really just skipped it altogether.  Not bad considering that in the past year and a half that we've had our gym membership I've been lucky to make it to the gym even 5 times in a month!

It's funny....my husband and I have been together for more than 10 years now.  Every Christmas, Valentine's Day, Birthday, etc., I've asked him for the same item, which he's never once bought for me yet....a perfume that he would like me to wear.  This year, for Christmas, my wish list is very different.  Thanks to Reyna's sister's blog, I've discovered a couple of new items that she has made sound so fantastic that I want some too (and no, I have no delusions about running 100 mile races even if I do get these items).  Top two items on my list?  Snuggbuds for my iPod because I hate having to continuously push my current earbuds back into my ears.  And Mizuno running shoes.  They have an awesome program to help you figure out what kind of shoe would work best with your type of gait.  I'm seriously coveting both of these items right now!  Seriously though....so funny that both of my top items are fitness-related this year when I've been using excuses to avoid fitness for so many years before this!  Just wish I would have figured out how good being in shape and exercising feels before I'd gotten as far down the wrong road as I did!

For those of you who bought hats....

I meant to include a little care-card in with all of the hat orders I sent out, but I wanted to make them look kind of fancy (cause you can't just type it up on a computer and leave it simple, right?) and so I didn't get around to doing them!  So...if you bought a hat from me, you probably want to know how to clean it, right?  All the hats are machine washable, preferably on a gentle cycle (but regular cycle shouldn't hurt them any either) with warm or cold water (not hot!).  Machine dry-able too!  Just don't use the highest heat setting.  A few common sense things...try to avoid washing it with anything that has velcro on it or with buttons that could snag the yarn.  Other than that, there are no restrictions!

Reyna, I'm tempted to take up your suggestion and set up an account on Etsy or something for people to order hats.  I just don't want to have to pay the fees!  I might have to see if my husband has an idea for how to set it up on here so that people can order and then give them a link for the Step-Out page to pay for them...something to think about anyway.

Being a PWD of a CWD

I've been feeling the need to write this post for a while, but I kept procrastinating.  Sarah's post the other day about her husband's confusion over her inability to look at her child's plate of food and just know the carb count reminded me that I've been putting it off (I hope I've interpreted that correctly, Sarah!).  I needed to find a night when I actually felt like talking about it, which is kind of hard to do.  Even tonight, I'd rather not.  But I know I need to, not just for myself, but for the other PWDs out there with CWDs.  That's Parent With Diabetes of a Child With Diabetes.  This might be a bit slow-going, but I'm going to try to get my main thoughts and frustrations out there in a way that other people can understand.....

When strangers first find out that Lily has diabetes, their initial reaction is sympathy.  I'm never bothered by that reaction.  I know most people are kind-at-heart and anything they might say or do that could upset me is usually done out of simple ignorance.  When strangers find out that I am also diabetic, the sympathy usually disappears.  It's not replaced with negative feelings though.  Just with a vague idea that since I'm diabetic too, Lily's diagnosis probably didn't devastate me in the same way that other parents, parents without prior knowledge of diabetes, were devastated.  Don't get me wrong, there are some benefits to being well-acquainted with diabetes at the time of a child's diagnosis.  I was still devastated, possibly in more ways than those of you who weren't as familiar with the disease.  But the long hours spent with educators and nutritionists, learning the ins and outs of diabetes, the hows and whys, the carb counting, and all those teeny little details that make such a big difference in our days....well, let's just say that the long hours were shortened into a few hours here and there.  I knew how to count carbs.  I knew about insulin-to-carb ratios, how an insulin pump works, why they're beneficial, etc.  But there's another side to that coin....

Being an parent with diabetes of a child with diabetes is like being the featured performer in a high-wire act when they only training you've ever had is years of walking the same familiar path.  There's a whole lot of emphasis on that analogy.  It's the absolute best I can come up with to describe what my reality is like.  You see, I had years of dealing with my own diabetes.  MY DIABETES.  I knew how much insulin I needed without counting up each little carb gram.  I knew what my blood sugar was before I tested.  It was a familiar path.  Sure, there were bumps here and there.  I knew, when I came to those bumps, that I just needed to move over as far as possible to the right side of the path and keep on going.  When those same bumps come along for Lily's diabetes, if I move over to the right, the high-wire is gone and I plummet to Earth, hoping that there's a safety net below to catch us all.  That plate of food that I look at and know how much insulin I need?  If I do that for Lily's plate of food and I'm off by even 5 grams, her blood sugar will either plummet or sky-rocket.  My diabetes and how I take care of myself has become "instinctive".  It doesn't require much of my thought anymore.  I know what's best for me and I do it, without thinking most of the time.  That's how MY DIABETES works.  One of the most difficult parts of being a PWD of a CWD is coming to the realization that MY DIABETES is not the same as LILY'S DIABETES.  Many of you are also followers of another blog titled Your Diabetes May Vary.  I love that title!  Because it is so incredibly true.  With LILY'S DIABETES, nothing is instinctive.  More often than not, I feel completely lost.  Because I'm her primary caretaker, the one in charge of her care from morning to night nearly every day, I've learned quickly that with her diabetes, precision is the key.  Everything has to be precise!  Food has to be measured into the smallest carb possible.  Insulin is doled out in as small of an increment as we can manage.  There is absolutely no room for error.  There is no looking at her plate and just knowing how much she needs.  Thirty extra minutes of activity that wasn't planned for and I'm left holding a little girl who's crying because she's terrified by the uncontrollable jerking that her body is doing.  One little piece of candy that wasn't bolused for and I have a little girl who sucks down water like she's been trapped in the desert for a week.  For Lily's diabetes, I have to walk that high-wire as carefully as I possible can.  I have no wiggle room when it comes to her health and well-being.

That being said, there's just one other thing I've learned as a PWD of a CWD that I want to share with all of you....sometimes, you just can't be perfect.  I know as moms, we feel it's our job to make everything as perfect as we possibly can for our children.  We feel that a hundred times more when our children have a chronic illness.  We get caught up in the idea that it is our "job" to keep their blood sugars perfectly on track and we beat ourselves up whenever an off number pops up.  Unfortunately, with children as little as Lily is, off numbers pop up a lot.  Here's what I've learned....my "job" is not to keep her numbers perfectly in line.  As much as I would love to do that, it's just not possible.  Growth spurts, extra activity, germs, everything throws a kink into the mix (add juggling all of those balls to my high-wire act!).  My "job" is correct her off numbers.  That's it.  Right there.  I'm here to correct her numbers when they are off and to try to do my best to keep her happy and healthy while she's off being the kid that she should be.  I want her to be as carefree and happy as possible and I refuse to burden her with her diabetes just yet.  I will educate her as much as I can and prepare her for when she's ready for that burden.  But I'll be the one to worry and carry the load while she lives as every child should.  That is what makes my efforts and stress worth it!

Christmas Card Exchange!

Okay, I've had to take a couple of days off from blogging to get some work done on hats.  I currently have a two-tone green one that just needs some ends tucked in, a ribbed black hat with red stripes that is being blocked (it's where you wet the yarn down and stretch it out into the shape you want it to have and then let it dry), a deep red hat with cream stripes that I just started and am hoping doesn't turn out looking too much like a candy cane, and two more hats that I need to start up.  Good thing hats don't take too long to do!  I'm hoping I can have the two orders I have finished up and into the mail within a week!  Gotta get them done so I can start on my own hat.  I bought a lovely teal wool yarn and a silvery-gray yarn to make up a hat and scarf set, when I get a chance!

Okay, the Christmas stuff....here's the deal.  Jill West (does she have a blog?  Someone clue me in, if she does!) organized a D-Family Gift Exchange on Elfster.  If you're interested in signing up, I believe the deadline is November 17th.  You can sign up by clicking HERE.

The Christmas Card Exchange!  That one is through me.  I always have lots of leftover Christmas cards after the holidays are over.  What better way to use those extras up and make even more connections than to start a card exchange with the D-OC!  Basically, all it requires of you is that you send me your mailing address.  I'll compile a list of all the addresses and then email it out to everyone who signs up.  You just have to send cards out to all those on the list.  Personally, I love Christmas cards.  They're the best kind of mail to get and are so worth the cost of stamps to send!  So, if you want to sign up and receive a few extra Christmas cards this year, just send me an email at cindyroerig@hotmail.com.  Write :Christmas Card in the subject line.  Deadline is December 1st!

I got my report card today!  Lily's A1C clocked in at 8.6, exactly the same as at her last check-up.  I'm so incredibly happy with that!  She's had a whole lot less lows and is doing really well with everything.  I was a little worried her levels might have gone up.  So this report card is quite the relief!  Her endocrinologist made a few changes to her basal and sensitivity settings since Lily tends to trend upwards at night.  Hopefully that'll do the trick to getting us back on track!  Until we're sure that the settings are right, I might have some long, sleep-deprived nights ahead!  So on that note, I think I'll head off to get some rest before the next blood sugar check!