The hectic, stressful, beautiful life of a diabetic mom with a diabetic child.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Would you believe there's a topic I haven't touched on yet?
In the last couple of weeks, I've seen some posts here in there in the DOC about being overwhelmed with diabetes and all it entails. I try to keep a mostly up-beat attitude in my writing on here in regards to the diabetes stuff especially. I don't want the parents out there reading my blog to get the idea that I'm angry or upset or have horribly negative feelings about diabetes. The truth is, most of the time, it doesn't even occur to me to have negative feelings about it. It is what it is and it's a part of my life. I just keep on living. But, I don't want to paint it all rosy and pretty either, because it's definitely not that. So, here's a little tidbit I haven't yet shared....I get overwhelmed too! Diabetes burnout comes around for a visit every now and then. When Meri posted a little while ago about giving her youngest son a "break" from diabetes, a part of me was phenomenally jealous! Seriously, how cool would that be? To have someone bringing my meter to me, doing my calculations for me, saving me from having to think about it at all. That would be AWESOME! And while they're at it, why don't they just take on Lily's d-care too? For me, there's an added difficulty to diabetes burnout. I don't mind letting my own d-care slide a little bit when I'm feeling overwhelmed, but even when I let mine slide, I can't bring myself to compromise on Lily's care. I can't let her down. I have to keep going, no matter how overwhelmed I am with all of the food calculations, insulin adjustments, the exact measurements that have no room for error. I'd say that I don't know how Meri does it, managing 3 diabetic boys. But really, we all know how she does it, don't we? She does it with the grace and beauty that is part of Meri and all she does. And with a little help from her swelly brain. And she does it because really, is there any other option? So, diabetes burnout...those wonderful feelings of being overwhelmed, of falling beneath the surface again and again....they come and they go and we just keep on going. Because there really isn't any other choice. We come through the other side of them and are immediately grateful to have made it through another episode, to have crossed another bridge. We're immensely relieved that we didn't give in and throw in the towel like we wanted to. And our lives are made more beautiful and more phenomenal for having gone through it.
On a happier note....I snapped a picture of Lily wearing her birthday present before her party last weekend:
And no post would be entirely complete without one of my little man too: