I've been off this week. You may have noticed in my blogs. I'm just feeling "off"....not quite myself, not quite 100%, tired and worn out and just not all there. My husband and I were sick a few weeks back. We both were running fevers of 100 for three weeks straight. He's recovered and I've been feeling better, but if I over-due it or don't get enough rest, then I suffer a relapse and feel myself slipping back into it. Oh, the joys of having a rogue immune system!
You know what it's like to have a lead foot? You're driving along in the fast lane, zipping through traffic. No one else is going as fast as you are and eventually, you get stuck behind someone who doesn't agree to going your speed. It's frustrating, right? You can't get around them and you just sit there behind them, wishing they would speed up or get out of the way. My husband is an excellent driver. He's never even gotten a speeding ticket. But in life, he has a lead foot. He is a WORK. A. HOLIC! Not in the way you would think though. He doesn't work more than his 40-45 hours a week. He comes home in time for dinner. He's great about that. But he's a work-a-holic in the way that he never takes a break. He gets up bright and early in the morning, goes off to work, never takes his coffee breaks, keeps himself to 30 minutes or less for lunch, comes home and drags us all off to the gym, helps cook dinner, picks up around the house, spends his weekends mowing the lawn, fixing my car, and just generally doing basic maintenance and upkeep around the house. The man doesn't rest! Sounds kind of nice, right? The problem is....no one else works as hard as he does. To be honest with you, I'm not capable of working as hard as he does. If the kids are fed, dressed, happy, healthy, and interacted with, I'm happy. If there are a few toys left on the floor or the carpet hasn't been vacuumed for a day or two or there are dishes in the sink....I'm not going to worry and stress over it and send the kids off to play by themselves just so I can get it all done. Don't get me wrong, the kids do play by themselves occasionally and I do pick up, do dishes, vacuum, whatever. But I'm not overly stressed about making sure it all gets done when it all should be done. My husband does.
I'm bringing this up tonight and sharing this with all of you because it's a problem for us every Friday, but more so when I'm not feeling well. I don't get as much done when I'm feeling under-the-weather. And Fridays are tough for my husband because he's dealt with his co-workers all week long. Remember the work-till-you-drop mentality of my husband? Fridays, he always comes home frustrated and angry. He's been busy pulling his weight at work all week long. And Friday comes around and he feels like he has not only been pulling his own weight, but pulling the weight of everyone else too. He feels like others aren't pulling their fair share. It's not really something you can bring up at work, is it? You can't really come out and yell at your co-workers for their lack of motivation. So, he comes home cranky. And I'm completely honest with you when I say that I will never be able to work as hard as my husband does, to do as much for our family as he does. I just can't. I need my relaxation time. I can't bring myself to stress over the little things. This all makes it a little easier for my husband to direct some of his resentment towards me when he gets home on Fridays. Today just happened to be a rough one since as soon as he got home, I crawled into bed and fell asleep. I didn't intend to. I was just talking to him while he changed from work to home clothes. The kids were busy eating dinner in the dining room, just 10 feet away from our bedroom. And I just drifted off. My wonderful husband let me nap for a couple of hours while taking care of the kids. He really is a great guy. I just have to keep calling him out on his workaholic, never take a break tendencies and maybe eventually, he'll decide to try those breaks, right?