New gadgets and new struggles...

Reyna was totally right on about how going home messes with you!  My husband and I only make the trip back twice a year, even though it's only a 5 hour drive away.  But I'm not a fan of going back.  It's a small town and the favorite pastime is gossip.  I've never been all that comfortable with gossip and am pretty fearful of being gossipped about.  Funny how returning to your hometown can make you feel like you're right back in grade school again!  Thanks, everyone, who commented on my last post and understand where I was coming from.  It's not that I think adultery is okay, because it's very much not.  But...no one knows what happens behind closed doors and when someone is in the end of their days, none of their time should be tainted by the hostilities and judgements of others.  Those days are just too precious!

On to better things...I have a new toy!  I'm so incredibly happy with it.  I've been going back and forth about getting a heart rate monitor.  All the personal trainers rave about how useful they are.  Everyone I know who has undertaken weight loss has said how useful they are.  But, they're expensive!  Seriously, if you want to get one that's good and going to last you, I've been told you have to pay at least $100.  So, I ruled out getting one.  Until I came across an incredible deal on Amazon.  If you're interested in getting one, click on that and it'll take you straight to the deal I got...a Garmin Forerunner 305.  They're usually $300, but because there's a newer model of it out, Amazon is unloading the old ones for $130 or so.  Fantastic deal!  I programmed mine this morning and wore it for my workout today.  It has a chest strap with the sensors that was actually pretty comfortable.  I can see how wearing it for a long time would cause some chaffing, but I worked out for 58 minutes (burned 680 calories!) and didn't have any problems.  I was able to keep an eye on my heart rate the entire time and held my pace to keep in the 130-140 bpm range.  Love it and highly recommend it!

Oh, my new struggles....this whole meditation thing is so much harder than I thought it would be!  I have a hard time focusing on just being still and quiet, pushing the thoughts out of my mind and just being.  It's not as easy as it sounds, is it?  I've splurged on a new iPod for myself and added in the Best of Enya album.  I'm hoping the soothing music will help give me something to focus on.  The other struggle with it is just finding a good time for it.  I'm having some serious problems with that!  I started out doing meditation at night, after my children and husband are in bed so I won't be interupted.  Sounds like a good time, right?  Except for one thing...if I do the meditation right, my mind is so refreshed from it that I can't sleep!  All.  Night.  Long.  Oh, I hate not being able to sleep!  I'm trying to figure out how to do it earlier in the day.  Maybe add it in during my time at the gym, if I can just find a good, quiet place to do it there!  If not, I'm going to have to start making my husband do some alone time with the kids as soon as he gets home from work!  But I will get it done!  I need to get my energy and intelligence back!  I read an article recently about how parts of our brains randomly go to sleep on us when we're sleep-deprived.  It's no wonder I seem like a blubbering lunatic sometimes!

Okay...one more thing to leave you with!  I'm adding something to my posts.  Fun things, really.  This is just a fun way for all of you to learn a little bit more about me and I think it just might be a bit cathartic for me as well.  I'm going to give you all a confession at the end of my posts!  I'll confess a flaw of mine, something that you might not know about me.  Maybe it'll be something that happened that day, something I did, or something that I see as an issue for me.  Fun stuff!  Because, really, we all want to know the dirt on people, don't we?  So, my confession for tonight....I judge people at the gym when they don't wipe down the equipment they've used.  Seriously, I know it's a huge problem for me.  I'm completely grossed out when someone works out on a machine, even if it's just for a few minutes, and then walks away without sanitizing it.  You just sweated all over that thing and you're not even going to wipe it down?  Ick!

And...no post would be complete without a picture of my goofy little children!  Love them!